Quiet Grace

God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.

Living one day at a time;
Enjoying one moment at a time;
Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace;
Taking, as He did, this sinful world
as it is, not as I would have it;
Trusting that He will make all things right
if I surrender to His Will;
That I may be reasonably happy in this life
and supremely happy with Him
Forever in the next.
Amen.

–Reinhold Niebuhr

There is something to be said for the ability to maintain a state of grace in turbulent and trying times.  It is something that i try very hard to maintain as i feel that that’s my job as my Master’s slave.  The world is a trying and turbulent place, it’s my place to maintain a peaceful atmosphere for my Master to rest and recharge His batteries.  One of the ways that i try to do this is to leave petty issues behind me.  Holding on to the stress of the day myself will only create an atmosphere of tension which doesn’t need to be in the home.  The home should be a sanctuary from the pressures and turbulence of the outside world.  A place to relax and be one’s self.

Fostering a quiet grace is not easy.  There are times when one wants to be petty, when things get to you that really shouldnt.  Things that you know you should just let go but can’t.  It’s at those times when it’s good to reflect on the things to stop and mediate; find that quiet place within yourself.

Just because a Master is suppose to have His emotions under control, doesn’t mean that it’s something that should be tested.  my job is to make things easier for my Master…and that includes not being a drain on His emotional and physical health. i always try to be a blessing and not a burden.  And if you are feeling as though you are a burden, look inward and reflect, change how you are so that you can become that blessing in your Master’s life.

 

Confession of the pain whimp

Okay okay i admit it. i like the flogger…okay more than like i LOVE it.  Now for those that know me, you all know that i’m a whimp when it comes to the ouchy things but curious as i am…i just had to know what a flogger felt like.  OMG, i think it was love at first swat.  Could this be my inner pain slut emerging through….well, lets not go quite that far yet.  But i could possibly see some more swats in my future.

Is it wrong to want to fall to my knees with the flogger in my hands and beg Master to swat my naked ass and pussy? I think about it often, fantasize day dream.  Wanting to feel that swat against my skin.  It’s a new feeling and want…and like a kid that’s been shown a cool new toy, i just cant get enough of it.

Who knows maybe a new love of nipple clamps and riding bats are on the horizon.  But for now, there is a definite love of the flogger.

 

Sub vs. Slave

i have seen this question posted in hundreds if not thousands of different places. i used to have a position on it, where a sub retained certain control over her life and a slave didn’t. Simplistic and down and dirty but the basics work. But my definition has changed a bit as i have grown in the lifestyle.

i am a slave, not because of some definition someone made but because that’s what my Master says i am. i have been told by other’s that such and such is not the actions of a slave or that some of my mannerisms where not slave like, and these statements would cause me great distress. But as i have grown in the lifestyle and in my life with my Master i have learned, although occasional setbacks arise that is doesn’t matter what others call me as long as my Master calls me His.

So call me a sub, a slave, even vanilla, it doesn’t really matter. Because the only name that matters is HIS, and as long as i am HIS, i am happy.

 

31 Things You Learn From Watching Porn

31 Things You Learn From Watching Porn

http://dennisnajee.wordpress.com/2008/08/27/31-things-you-learn-from-watching-porn/

1. Women wear high heels to bed.

2. Men are never impotent. No matter their age.

3. When going down on a woman 10 seconds is more than satisfactory.

4. If a woman gets busted masturbating by a strange man, she will not scream with embarrassment, but rather insist he have sex with her.

5. Women smile appreciatively when men splat them in the face with sperm.

6. Women enjoy having sex with ugly middle-aged men.

7. Women moan uncontrollably when giving a blow job.

8. Women always orgasm when men do.

9. A blow job will always get a woman off a speeding ticket.

10. All women are noisy fucks.

11. People in the 70’s couldn’t fuck unless there was a wild guitar solo in the background.

12. Those tits are real.

13. A common and enjoyable sexual practice for a man is to take his half-erect penis and slap it repeatedly on a woman’s butt.

14. Men always groan ‘OH YEAH’ when they cum.

15. If there is two of them they ‘high five’ each other. (and the girl isn’t disgusted!)

16. Double penetration makes women smile.

17. Asian men don’t exist.

18. If you come across a guy and his girlfriend having sex in the bushes the boyfriend won’t bash seven shades of shit out of you if you shove your cock in his girlfriend’s mouth.

19. There’s a plot.

20. When taking a woman from behind, a man can really excite a woman by giving her a gentle slap on the ass.

21. Nurses suck patients cocks.

22. Men always pull out.

23. When your girlfriend busts you getting head from her best friend, she’ll only be momentarily pissed off before fucking both of you.

24. Women never have headaches.

25. When a woman is sucking a man’s cock, it’s important for him to remind her to ’suck it’

26. Assholes are clean.

27. A man ejaculating on a woman’s butt is a satisfying result for all parties concerned.

28. Women always look pleasantly surprised when they open a man’s pants and find a cock there.

29. Men don’t have to beg.

30. When standing during a blow job, a man will always place one hand firmly on the back of the kneeling woman’s head and the other proudly on his hip.

31. Pigtails = handlebars

 

Direction Of The Relationship

http://dennisnajee.wordpress.com/2008/08/21/direction-of-the-relationship/

A Master needs to have the inner strength to take control of the relationship while steering it in the direction that He wants it to go. Too many fail to take the responsibility associated with being a Master seriously. Leadership does have it’s price.

Most newbies are enamored with the idea of being in control. To have one do whatever He says is a fantasy. However, like all fantasies, reality tends to be a little different. The BDSM world is a great deal more than just whips and chains. The deeper that people get into the lifestyle, the more responsibility that comes along. This is magnified when a relationship is established.

What One’s responsibility? It starts with safety. This needs to be foremost one a Master/Dom’s mind. Even while He is enjoying the pleasure of a scene, it is up to Him to determine if things are proceeding safely or not. Many do not like to hear that if one is hurt, He is the One who is at fault. It is just too easy to want the control without the responsibility. Unfortunately, that is a fantasy and not how reality works.

 

A Night At The Farmhouse

The salesman stopped at a farmhouse one evening to ask for room and board for the night. The farmer told him there was no vacant room.
“I could let you sleep with my daughter,” the farmer said, “if you promise not to bother her.”
The salesman agreed. After a hearty supper, he was led to the room. He undressed in the dark, slipped into bed, and felt the farmer’s daughter at his side.
The next morning he asked for his bill.
“It’ll be just two dollars, since you had to share the bed,” the farmer said.
“Your daughter was very cold,” the salesman said.
“Yes, I know,” said the farmer. “We’re going to bury her today.”

 

The Facts Of Life

A little girl runs out to the backyard where her father is working, and asks him, “Daddy, what’s sex?”
Her father sits her down, and tells her all about the birds and the bees. He tells her about conception, sexual intercourse, sperms and eggs. He goes on to tell her about puberty, menstruation, erections, wet-dreams…and he thinks, what the hell, and goes on to tell her the works.
He covers a wide and varied assortment of sub topics and by the time he’s finished, his daughter is somewhat awestruck with this sudden influx of bizarre new knowledge. Her father finally asks: “So what did you want to know about sex for?”
“Oh, mommy said to tell you lunch would be ready in a couple of secs…”

 

Ever The Opportunist

One night a couple was lying in bed. The husband was feeling frisky so he rolled over and tapped his wife on the shoulder and started rubbing her arm. The wife turns over and says “I’m sorry honey, but I have a gynaecologist appointment tomorrow and I want to stay fresh.”
Rejected, the husband turns over and tries to sleep. A few minutes later he rolls over and whispers in her ear “Do you have a dentist appointment, too?”

 

The Yin and Yang of the M/s relationship

http://dennisnajee.wordpress.com/2008/04/25/the-yin-and-yang-of-the-ms-relationship/

Nature is one of balance.  Everything has its counterpart which allows for the natural flow of things.  For every yin, there is a yang.

The M/s relationship falls into this category.  We often refer to the power exchange as the basis of these relationships.  But, we also notice that each person compliments the other.  Individuals in this lifestyle tend to be at the far end of the spectrum.  We lean towards being absolute in terms of either domination or submissiveness.  The tendency to desire a split within ourselves is not common.

Each person in these relationships fulfills the other.  It is impossible to submit without having one to submit to.  Also, one cannot dominate unless there is someone to control.  When alone, each is an individual; when together there is fulfillment.

There is also a balance of power.  The total power exchange is done with the Western view of power-strength, aggression, and domination.  A submissive gives up this masculine form of power willingly.  However, she still retains the feminine power which includes adaptability, negotiation, and consensual submissiveness.  Goreans will recognize the two powers Norman described.  Each form of power lends itself to the fulfillment of the other.

Those of us in this lifestyle understand that it is not a one-sided relationship.  A slave who is not having her needs met will tend to wither and die (figuratively speaking).  Her value comes from her ability to serve her Master; it is also where her pleasure comes from.  Abusive Masters overlook this simple yet imperative concept.  The natural order of things necessitates both parts for success.

 

Unrealistic Expectations

http://dennisnajee.blogspot.com/2008/08/unrealistic-expectations.html

Of late we have referred to some of the expectations that people have when entering a M/s relationship. It seems that many believe this type of relationship is the solution to all their problems. It is common to find a new person who is truly submissive (or dominant) take to this lifestyle immediately. Years of failure in traditional relationships left them with a void. Finding the M/s way of life is like a homecoming to them. They realize where they belong.

However, as we have mentioned on a number of occasions, life does happen. All that others need to deal with arise in our lives. While the M/s foundation affects all areas of our existence, it is not the only area where we operate in. Everyday responsibilities must be attended to. Failure to acknowledge this is setting oneself up for disappointment.

A great deal of what we experience in any situation is directly tied to the expectations we have entering it. What are your expectations with your M/s relationship? Do you believe this is the solution to all your problems? If so, you might want to reconsider that idea. The same problems that one enters into this lifestyle with will still be prevalent after submitting. Life issues continue to exist. This cannot be stressed enough.

Having someone else involved in your life can help you to overcome certain difficulties. By submitting, many of the decisions are taken away from you. This can be a blessing if one is bad at making decisions. Financial circumstances can change since there is someone else helping with the bills. However, just because one submitted does not necessarily mean that all problems go away. To expect this is completely out of touch with reality.

To have a successful M/s relationship, and to avoid future disappointment, it is necessary to enter with a realistic idea of what will happen. This lifestyle does not solve all of one’s problems. It is a way of living which allows us to be true to our nature. We develop a manner of interacting with another which is based in a methodology which works for us. It is understood that the person we are dealing with is human and will make mistakes. We resist the temptation to put him or her on a pedestal.

A M/s relationship can be one of the most fulfilling interactions one ever had. To be successful at it, there is a lot of effort required by both parties. Remember this when you suddenly realize that this lifestyle did not magically solve all your problems. In fact, different problems will arise because you entered this relationship. Accepting that as the reality will better prepare one to handle the unenviable situations when they arise.